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Marriage
Engrave this Quote Incompatibility. In matrimony a similarity of tastes, particularly the taste for domination.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Engrave this Quote The world has suffered more from the ravages of ill-advised marriages than from virginity.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Engrave this Quote Marriage. The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress and two slaves, making in all, two.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Engrave this Quote Fidelity. A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Engrave this Quote Bride. A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Medicine
Engrave this Quote Before undergoing a surgical operation, arrange your temporal affairs. You may live.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Military, the
Engrave this Quote Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Neutrality
Engrave this Quote Impartial. Unable to perceive any promise of personal advantage from espousing either side of a controversy.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Oceans
Engrave this Quote A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man, who has no gills.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Optimism
Engrave this Quote Optimism. The doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Engrave this Quote An optimist is a proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Patience
Engrave this Quote Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
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-Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911
Patriotism
Engrave this Quote Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Peace
Engrave this Quote Peace, in international affairs, is a period of cheating between two periods of fighting.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Persistence
Engrave this Quote A lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves a glorious success.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Philosophy
Engrave this Quote A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Engrave this Quote All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Planning
Engrave this Quote To bother about the best method of accomplishing an accidental result.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Politics
Engrave this Quote What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Engrave this Quote Nominee. A modest gentleman shrinking from the distinction of private life and diligently seeking the honorable obscurity of public office.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Praise
Engrave this Quote Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Engrave this Quote Admiration; is our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Prayer
Engrave this Quote Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Prejudice
Engrave this Quote A prejudice is a vagrant opinion without visible means of support.
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-Ambrose Bierce
Engrave this Quote Bigot, one who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not entertain.
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-Ambrose Bierce

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