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Poverty
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Look at me. I worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.
-Groucho Marx
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Reading
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From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
-Groucho Marx
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Relationships
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I won't belong to any organization that would have me as a member.
-Groucho Marx
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Sex
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Whoever named it necking is a poor judge of anatomy.
-Groucho Marx
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Soul
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The first thing which I can record concerning myself is, that I was born. These are wonderful words. This life, to which neither time nor eternity can bring diminution - this everlasting living soul, began. My mind loses itself in these depths.
-Groucho Marx
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Television
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I find television very educational. Every time someone switches it on I go into another room and read a good book.
-Groucho Marx
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Time
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Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana.
-Groucho Marx
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No man goes before his time -- unless the boss leaves early.
-Groucho Marx
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Books by and about Groucho Marx