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Advertising
Engrave this Quote Good wine needs no bush, and perhaps products that people really want need no hard-sell or soft-sell TV push. Why not? Look at pot.
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-Ogden Nash
Age
Engrave this Quote Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else.
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-Ogden Nash
Alcohol/Alcoholism
Engrave this Quote Candy, is dandy, but Liquor, is quicker.
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-Ogden Nash
Animals
Engrave this Quote The cow is of the bovine ilk: One end is moo, the other, milk.
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-Ogden Nash
Charity
Engrave this Quote They take the paper and they read the headlines. So they've heard of unemployment and they've heard of bread-lines. And they philanthropically cure them all by getting up a costume charity ball.
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-Ogden Nash
Chocolate
Engrave this Quote If some confectioners were willing
To let the shape announce the filling,
We'd encounter fewer assorted chocs,
Bitten into and returned to the box.
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-Ogden Nash
Conscience
Engrave this Quote I think remorse ought to stop biting the consciences that feed it.
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-Ogden Nash
Engrave this Quote There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is to have either a clear conscience or none at all.
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-Ogden Nash
Diets and Dieting
Engrave this Quote How easy for those who do not bulge to not overindulge!
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-Ogden Nash
Dogs
Engrave this Quote A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.
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-Ogden Nash
Family
Engrave this Quote A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.
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-Ogden Nash
Forgiveness
Engrave this Quote Remorse is a violent dyspepsia of the mind.
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-Ogden Nash
Grief, Grieving
Engrave this Quote No matter how deep and dark your pit, how dank your shroud, their heads are heroically unbloody and unbowed.
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-Ogden Nash
Happiness
Engrave this Quote The most exciting happiness is the happiness generated by forces beyond your control.
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-Ogden Nash
Hope
Engrave this Quote Man is a victim of dope in the incurable form of hope.
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-Ogden Nash
Insects
Engrave this Quote Some primal termite knocked on wood;
and tasted it, and found it good.
That is why your Cousin May
fell through the parlor floor today.
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-Ogden Nash, The Termite
Life
Engrave this Quote Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.
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-Ogden Nash
Marriage
Engrave this Quote A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick.
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-Ogden Nash
Engrave this Quote A little incompatibility is the spice of life, as long as he has income and she is pattable.
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-Ogden Nash
Engrave this Quote There is only one thing for a man to do who is married to a woman who enjoys spending money, and that is enjoy earning it.
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-Ogden Nash
Engrave this Quote To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up.
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-Ogden Nash
Engrave this Quote Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open.
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-Ogden Nash
Engrave this Quote If you are really Master of your Fate, it shouldn't make any difference to you whether Cleopatra or the Bearded Lady is your mate.
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-Ogden Nash
Men & Women
Engrave this Quote I have an idea that the phrase 'weaker sex' was coined by some woman to disarm the man she was preparing to overwhelm.
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-Ogden Nash
Money
Engrave this Quote The further through life I drift the more obvious it becomes that I am lacking in thrift.
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-Ogden Nash

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